The Corporate Slave

Life is a journey. Come and join me as i spend moments with interesting people, visit astounding places, attend meaningful events, or just pondering things out.

Dear TATAY

I wrote this post as a tribute to my father in commemoration with Father’s Day celebration last June.

I was once asked during one of my magazine interviews, “If you can hold on to just one memory from your life forever, what would that be?”

My reply was “That will be the moments spent with my father. A father is a role model for his children. He is their first hero and their inspiration. I always wanted to emulate my father in whatever manner I could. Whether this meant adopting his outlook in life, his determination and dedication, the way he ate, socialized with other people or the way he treated his children and other family members – I wanted to be exactly like him.”

Tatay in his late teens.

Tatay in his late teens.

I have very limited memories of my father. We lost him in a road accident when I was six. He was 22 then. I couldn’t say how painful that event to me at that time but I can vividly remember that I cried almost every hour in his wake. His death literally sucked the oxygen out of my body. It felt hard to breathe. The lost of a father is so heartbreaking to an adult. How could it be more excruciating to a helpless six-year old child?

Life of a son is a challenge without his father. The pain caused by his absence remains but turned into gentle sadness; a wound that has healed but left its mark. I will be turning 51 this year and sometimes wonder “what would life be if my father is around?” Would it still be the same path that I need to go through? Did I commit the same mistakes? Would I become better and stronger as a person?

It may be relative, but i consider myself a success now. All of this is nothing if not for the genes that I got not only from my mother but also from my father. Life is a bit comfortable for the past few years and it could have been sweeter if I can share that comfort with all members of my family.

CorpSlave with his siblings and their Nanay at his Father's wake.

CorpSlave with his siblings and their Nanay at his Father’s wake.

So wherever you are Tay, Happy Father’s day to you. Thank you for all the gifts you have given me, especially the gift of understanding the value of time, and that I need to be cognizant and appreciative of every day I have on this world and with those I hold dear. Seems only yesterday when you were teaching me how to dance the twist, when you brought me along in your jeepney traversing the Balintawak-Blumentritt route, and when you pinned my first honor ribbon in my first grade.

I have few memories of you Tay but that space in my being reserved for you remains empty and will never be filled in this lifetime. There are so much that I want to ask you but could not. There are a lot of life’s learnings that I learned on my own, mostly the hard way. Many times I plummeted but I think I mustered to rise from such situations unscathed. You have thought me to be tough, street smart, and focused.

Thank you Tay. Thank you for your love. Thank you for the memories. Thank you for being a good, hard working father who encouraged me to be the best person I can be and to do the best I can in everything I wish to achieve. I know that it will not be long; we will see each other again. But let me finish my journey first and enjoy time with our family. Our once small clan has expanded. You are already a Lolo to a handful of grandchildren.

Again thank you Tay. Mostly, thank you for being my father. I will never forget you as I continue with my own life’s journey.

I love you Tay and Happy Father’s Day. I will see you again.

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This entry was posted on October 1, 2015 by and tagged , .
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